My weakness is you..

Assalamualaikum semua :) Hope you guys being fine as always. So I'm here to tell something about today. Hmm firstly Ika mmg pressure tahap maximum. Masalah dah settle, pastu dtg yg baru. Hm entahlah. Tkpelah semua tu dugaan. Ika tk boleh nak tolak. Ika tk boleh nak marah. Tu dugaan, hadiah. I can't push it away from my life. Ika akan cuba ucap 'alhamdulillah' setiap apa yang Allah bagi. InsyaAllah :')

Petang tadi Ika main iPad. iPad umi. Tweet and online using it. Pastu buka youtube dgr lagu wide awake. Pastu saje je search lagu your call. Yang Adam pernah bg kt Ika dlu. Ika dgr pastu terigt kt dia. Then Ika terigt ade satu lagu dia bg and Ika tk igt tajuk dia so I click his twitter profile to find out lagu ape. Then Ika terbaca lah semua tweet2 dia dulu. And I really missed it. Ika gelak2 baca conversation kiteorg dulu. And one tweet tu Ika sedih... Masa kiteorg gaduh, and konflik sikit... Pastu Ika jumpa lagu tu. Ika dgr kt PC. And my heart started to cry. Ika cuba fight, Ika ckp mcm mcm kt diri Ika tapi lamalama Ika nangis juga. Ika nangis bukan sbb Ika sedih Ika kena tinggl, tapi Ika nangis sbb Ika rindukan diri Ika yg dulu, yg masa dgn dia. Kenangan manis yg Ika pernah rasa. He's the best. Dia bukan je dah curi hati Ika, tapi dia dah curi life Ika. Dia baik. Dia kawan Ika yg terbaik. Tapi Ika tk jamin baik dia tu kekal smpai ke akhir hayat kiteorg. Hm entahlah. Ramai tnye "wujud ke dia." "tk takut ke dia mcm budak yg kau kenal dlu?" "dia setia?" "dia jauh lah, mesti dia dah ade gf." Kata-kata tu semua sikit pun tk ubah hati Ika.. Ika tetap dgn perjanjian Ika dgn dia. I will stay here and patiently wait for him. Ika tahu Ika dah amik risiko besar. And Ika tahu padahnya kalau penantian Ika tu sia-sia. Ika tahu sesangat and Ika berani berdepan dgn kesedihan, kepahitan. I'm ready :') InsyaAllah. Ika nak tgk sejauh mana Ika boleh tahan dgn penantian ni, sejauh mana Ika boleh simpan janji. :') InsyaAllah Ika boleh teruskan dgn senyuman. Allah sentiasa tolong hamba-Nya yg dalam kesusahan, tapi bersyarat! Syaratnya, jangan lupakan Allah. Hm tu je. Ika pun kekadang lupakanNya :'( Ika tahu Ika tk sepatutnya buat. Bila dah susah? Baru nak cari. Hmmm Ika tahu perangai buruk Ika ni tk patut ade. Harap-harap Ika dapat ubah :') Sebelum ajal smpai, kan? Hihi.

Mmg Ika mengaku Ika rindu tahun lepas. 2011 banyak sgt kenangan manis pahit. Bittersweet stories. Form 2 life.. indahnya, subhanAllah. Kalau boleh Ika nak tgk balik mcm mana sweetnya life Ika masa tu. Ika happy, Ika tkde sikit pun rasa sedih dgn family, kawankawan and Allah and also Adam :')







So here the song which make me cry.. oh okay bye! Hahah

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Shopping $_$

Some people said money is the best way to find happiness and some other said money can't buy happiness at all. I don't know which is I am right now 'cause my mum pernah ajar kiteorg, duit tk menjanjikan kebahagiaan but sometimes bila beli barang yg kita suka, means? Bahagia lah? Tahu bahagia sgt tapi bahagia tu tk kekal lama :) Huhu~ And tadi nak pergi beli barang angah. Pastu melencong tempat lain. Gi beli dress -__- hahaha bukan lah dress, mcm blouseblouse and handbag. And I don't even know what the hell i am doing... hahaha kenapa amik tu semua pastu letak kt counter, umi pun mcm tk kisah je. Hohoho best gila time tu. Bersyukur tk terhingga. Selalu shopping setahun sekali tu yg nmpk baju cantik, mcm batak sikit. hahaha. Thanks to umi :)

Masa balik, just now before maghrib abah balik. I asked him "dad, can i ask?" "sure." "I want something from you..." "what it is?" "hmmm" pastu umi ckp "iphone dia jatuh." my dad terkejut and asked me mcm mcm. I was like.... mummm!!! bukan pasal iPhone ni nak ckp psl iPad hahahaha nak iPad okayyy. hahaha umi pun tk terigt time tu. hoho tkpelah. My dad tk marah, just terkejut. Yelah dia nak marah ape, benda dah jadii :( Hmmm. Sedih gak ah tgk iPhone berkecai mcm tu jee T~~T huuuuu. Tkpelah benda dah jadi, Ika redha ;)

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;)

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I'm trying to find a right person to stay with me..

Assalamualaikum, nampaknya tittle and gmbr nmpk sad je. Haha yes I am :') Tapi tk tahu mcm mana nak mula. Haish, mcm mcm masalah datang. Macammacam dah jadi kt dlm rumah ni, dlm family ni, dlm life Ika ni. Bukan Ika nak salahkan Allah, salahkan takdir tapi Ika rasa sedih sgt dgn semua ni. Okay, masalah family Ika boleh handle. Tapi bila dtg masalah mcm ni, Ika perlukan someone, perlukan sokongan, yes I am. I need it so much. I'm starving for this. Seriously. Kalau form 2 dlu kalau ade masalah, cepatcepat orang tu datang and bagi advice, semangat tapi skrg... :'))) No one. It is not about Adam. Please jangan igt dia yg selalu kasi advice. Dia tk pernah dikaitkan dlm ni. Dia pun tk pernah tahu masalah ni. Bila dgn Adam, Ika tk berani nak bagitahu apeape. Just kawan and cikgu jelah. Tu tk semua, just half on it. Entahlah. Ika tk tahu nak describe how I feel right now. Nak nangis, ye memang everynight air mata jadi peneman before tidur. Nak sedih, ye everyday hati bersedih. Tapi bibir memaksa utk senyum depan org ramai. Suara terpaksa utk tipu cakap Ika okay. Ika tk leh nak kata ape, tkleh nak buat ape. Satu persatu masalah datang. Orang kata, "Suffer first, enjoy the rewards later." Yah that's what I'm waiting for. Ika and family dah ckup menderita tapi kiteorg paksa diri utk tahan and katakan kiteorg kuat utk face it. :') whole family. Tapi utk privacy, Ika perlu kan someone.. Yes I am :'( Ika tk sanggup nak tahan sorang-sorang. Kalau boleh Ika tk nk bagitahu directly yg Ika need it tapi dari body language, dari gaya tkkn tk faham kot?! Seriously Ika sedih dgn diorg ni... Hm. No one could understand.. Mana diri dia yang dulu? Hmmm :/

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Thanks for reading. xoxo

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